Belt Ceremony

This past Saturday was the belt ceremony for tae kwon do. I had to share the picture that is below. I took it right after the Black Belt had tied Katie's new 1st degree red belt around her waist and Katie turned to where Rick was standing. I was fortunate enough to click the shutter just at that moment and got a great picture.

Testing and Puking

This past Saturday Katie tested to advance to 1st degree red belt in tae kwon do. She did pretty good on her form and one steps, but her kicks seemed a little off. After testing, we went to McDonald's for a celebratory lunch, which has become a tradition. You may be thinking, big whoop, McDonald's but we make a concerted effort to make dining at McDonald's an exception and not a rule. I did not grow up with fast food restaurants and have never gotten the hang of it, fortunately. Anyway, Katie considers it a treat especially when she gets to romp in the germ area . . . er . . . play area. Later that afternoon while Katie and I were straightening up Katie's room, Katie complained about not feeling well. A ploy to get out of cleaning? Perhaps, but she had been keeping her room pretty clean for the last seven months or so. I kept on going and Katie laid down on her floor and fell asleep. Then out of the blue, she stood up went into the hallway and puked. After I got her to the guest bathroom to finish, got her snuggled in bed and cleaned the carpet,  Katie informed me, "I am never eating McDonald's again." Well, guess we'll have to find a new after-tae-kwon-do-belt-testing tradition.

 Katie this past Saturday before testing. Not the best pose or picture. Her leg is bent and I gave her a toe-ectomy with my camera.

Back in the beginning when she was a white belt, the first belt, with one itty-bitty strip. Katie is in the middle of the picture.

Katie, three years old, and a white belt with Mr. Ben. Katie appears to be saying, "Huh?"

The Boys Are Back In Town

(My language is not the best or most proper in this post. If you are easily offended, toughen up!)

The boys are back in town and by "boys" I mean male or female rattlesnakes and by "back in town" I mean out of their winter hidey-holes.

Rick shot the first rattler of the year two days ago on Good Friday. Rick was heading down to the shop, which is the Quonset Hut, when he came upon a rattler stretched out across the road. For clarification sake we will call this snake Good Friday Bastard. Rick tried to run over Good Friday Bastard with the golf cart, but he coiled and then slithered into a culvert. The snake, not Rick. Rick rushed up to the house to grab his .45 and back to the shop to get a can of gasoline. He used the gas to flush the Good Friday Bastard out of the culvert and shortly after Rick dumped gas into the culvert Good Friday Bastard came sliding out only to have his head blown off.

Today, which is Easter, Rick was in the shop gathering the wood to make shelves for the kitchen in the missile base. He picked up a cardboard box and underneath it was a fingerling, a baby rattlesnake, whom for clarification sake we will call Little Bastard. Rick goes to the golf cart to get a shovel. He didn't want to shoot Little Bastard because Little Bastard was next to a can of gasoline. Of course when he returned to the shop equipped with a snake-killing shovel, Little Bastard was gone. After looking for him for twenty minutes, Rick hears the unmistakable vibration sound of an adult rattler. . .behind him. He turns and there is a big snake. When I say big, I mean it looked like he had just eaten or she was pregnant. For clarification we'll call this snake Fat Bastard. Fat Bastard also possessed a huge head, the kind that would have gotten him called names on the playground. Anyway, back to the golf cart Rick goes to get the .45. Since snakes can be little tricksters and escape out of the shop via the back or side, Rick decided to catch him exiting the shop. Rick went down the outside of the shop on the right side. Aha! Just as Rick thought, there was Fat Bastard trying to make a break for it! Rick expertly shot him so that his head only hung on by threads. Rick was pleased with himself. He out-maneuvered the sly snake. Then it was back into the shop to find the Little Bastard. Once there, holy crap!! There was Fat Bastard still in the same place. Well, who the hell was outside the shop?! Well, that must had been Medium Bastard! Not wanting to waste time figuring out who was who, Rick shot the real Fat Bastard in the head. Shortly thereafter, Rick found Little Bastard underneath the boards that he was gathering for shelving and about 6" from the before mentioned gas can. Because Rick is so spot on when he shoots, he shot Little Bastard and didn't blow up the shop. This weekend will forever be known as the Easter Weekend of  four bastards. To commemorate the start of staying-out-of-the-tall-grass, always-looking-where-you-step, and carrying-a-gun-every-single-time-you-go-outside season, or in short rattler season I have include pictures of the today's dead bastards for your viewing pleasure or to give you the heebie-jeebies.

From left to right: Medium Bastard, Little Bastard and Fat Bastard. Good Friday Bastard didn't get his picture taken.

Fat Bastard measured about 46" long if you account for the bends in his body. Rick couldn't get him in a straight line because by the time I came along with my camera, rigamortis was already setting in.

Fat Bastard and his big head. His head is at an angle here so you cannot see the full width. I bet he was a bully with all of the teasing he had to put up because of his mammoth head.

Bag o' snakes